A little humour for you…
http://www.sofn.org.uk/The_Collection/Jokes/litebulb.html
If you google “light bulb theology” you’ll see a few different versions of this…
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How many Charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one since his/her hands are in the air anyway.
How many Calvinists does it take to change a light bulb?
None. God has predestined when the lights will be on. Or it could be that Calvinists do not change light bulbs, they simply read out the instructions and pray the light bulb will decide to change itself.
How many Baptists or Brethren does it take to change a light bulb?
CHANGE?!
How many neo-evangelicals does it take to change a light bulb?
No one knows. They can’t tell the difference between light and darkness.
How many Pentecostals does it take to change a light bulb?
Ten. One to change the bulb and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.
How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?
One only. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
How many fundamentalists or independent Baptists does it take to change a light bulb?
One because anymore would mean compromise and God’s holy standards of light would slip.
How many liberal Christians does it take to change a light bulb?
At least ten, as they need to hold a debate on whether or not the light bulb exists. Even if they can agree upon the existence of the light bulb they still may not change it to keep from alienating those who might use other forms of light.
How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They always use candles.
How many campfire worship leaders does it take to change a light bulb?
One. But soon all those around can warm up to its glowing.
How many Episcopalians does it take to change a light bulb?
Ten. One to actually change the bulb and nine to say how much they liked the old one.
How many United Methodists does it take to change a light bulb?
We choose not to make a statement either in favour of, or against, the need for a light bulb however, if in your own journey you have found that a light bulb works for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship to your light bulb and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, florescent, three-way, long-lived and tinted; all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence through Jesus Christ.
How many Lutherans does it take to change a light bulb?
We read that we are to so fear and love God that we cannot by our own effort or understanding comprehend the replacement of an electromagnetic photon source. It is, rather by faith, not by our efforts (effected toward the failed worldly incandescence), that we truly see, and that our own works cannot fully justify us in the presence of our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ. Of course, the room is still dark.
How many missionaries does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one. But she has to write a prayer letter about it.